Sunday, April 5, 2009

How do we begin to heal?

He is a stranger to me now. The man I saw on the street today isn't the man I shared my life with. He isn't the man I opened my heart to. That man no longer exists. How can I ever learn to accept that and let go of this pain? I understand that I cannot help him. I understand that no one can help him. I understand that he will never, ever accept responsibility for what he has done. I understand that he is empty. I just don't understand why. Why?! How could I have been so naive? How could he be so cruel?


  1. This question is asked of each of everyone of us at one time or another. How do I heal?

    For me, I found these answers came slowly and at other time not at all. Not only did the answers as times goes unanswered but many times the questions themselves seem evasive and out of reach. Like a small child reaching for an apple on a branch of a tree but it so high above this child. Soon the child learns that the child must grow taller with each day until at last it can reach out and take the big red apple.

    In short one can’t tell another the how’s on healing and this path before us because for each of us it take both time honesty with self and others and patience.

    One will heal with understanding honesty and trust which will begin with self and then end in self. Like the little child reaching for that shinning red apple high above her/him. She/him will know the time when she/him reaches that point when the apple is in reach and will belong to them for the rest of their lives...

    You will heal as well as myself! For me believing I can keeps me in the right frame of mind so that I will never give up and like the children who knows they too with grow taller with each day and then be able to reach that red apple from the tall breach on this tree of knowledge and growth.

    Good luck and God bless!

  2. You heal when you realize that he killed the man you loved and buried him. You heal when you can mourn the loss. It's a long path...a lonely path. You such an incredible person. Blessings to you!

  3. Read Missing Pretend Guy @
    It might help you to know that all of us miss pretend guy.

  4. For me it was when I realized that he was a figment of my own imagination. I needed to make him caring, and loving and I would create scenarios so that he could get the credit for doing something kind and nice. I couldn't love the person he really was, he was an awful and manipulating man. Realize they don't change and you can move on